My second ‘Hypnobirth’ story

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My second daughter is now 14 months old. My pregnancy with her was very smooth just like my first. I seem to feel my best during pregnancy and my worst post-partum. So onto my hypnobirthing story with Scarlett (well as much as I can recall as I don’t have the best memory.)

I didn’t attend any hypnobirthing classes with my second pregnancy like I did with the first. I did read some of the book, occasionally listened to the cd towards the end and practiced some breathing.  I felt confident that I would experience not a painful birth, but a beautiful and empowering one. I was in a good mindset about this for my entire pregnancy. When people asked me if I was scared, I could honestly answer ‘not in the slightest. Just excited.’

I was overdue nearly two weeks and booked in for an advised induction the day after I gave birth naturally. I had been having very mild contractions on and off for the past day but not too many symptoms or labor. The midwife came to my home in the morning to give me a membrane sweep (suppose to loosen the cervix a bit and hopefully get things moving.) She left and a few hours later I started to have sporadic mild contractions. I kept going about my day but decided to call Dave (my fiance) to let him know what was happening as he was working at the Gold Coast that day and feared missing the birth.

All afternoon I experienced mild contractions that didn’t seem to be increasing in intensity much at all and I was still able to walk normally without having to stop. Dave came home and I made dinner for my daughter and put her to bed like normal (I think my body was kind of intuitively waiting to put her to bed before labor truly began. Strange things happen like this when your body takes over completely!) Dave and I went to bed around 9 hoping to get some sleep but didn’t really as contractions started to increase in intensity a little.

From here on I don’t remember much about the night. It is a blurred memory of swaying in the shower, leaning and swaying over my fitness ball in the soft lighting in the lounge room, rhythmically matching my breath up to my contractions, and purely just feeling and listening to my body. Dave was in and out of a light sleep on the sofa but would get up and gently rub my back or play with my hair when I had my contractions. He timed them too. I felt supported.

This memory instantly puts me in a place of calm. I felt centred, peaceful, and just where I was suppose to be. I was gently moving by baby down with each surge and breath, or should I say allowing my baby to move without resisting or tightening up. I did this by not labelling the sensations as painful, but as intense. Not seeing them as hurting me but seeing them as a powerful intelligence within my body allowing my baby to be born safely. Each surge was bringing my baby closer to me. 

At around 4am we made the decision to move to the hospital. We had called the midwife and she told us she thought that the contractions aren’t long enough yet and that we should wait some more. Instead, I followed my intuition and knew it was time to go, so we went anyway.

The car journey was extremely intense. I could feel Scarlett’s head had dropped signicantly inside of me and with each contraction I knew she was quickly moving further down. By this point, breathing through the powerful waves of contraction was no longer enough for me to ride them. I had to use my voice. Thinking back, we should have recorded it because it would have been hilarious to listen to afterwards. I didn’t scream but I used my voice in whatever way by humming or groaning to allow me to ride the intensity of the contractions.  

We parked at the hospital and no-one was in sight. It was dark and warm and I could see the glowing light of the hospital doors but had no idea how I was going to get there by walking. I didn’t want to walk, I wanted to lean on my fiance and groan. But he told me we had to walk, and somehow, I did. Step by step and a few contractions later we finally made it to the birthing suite. The receptionist asked me my details but all I could do was lean over the desk and make hilarious sounds during my FUCKING intense contraction. I wasn’t fully present at this point but completely inside my body, listening to and experiencing everything, working as a team with my baby and my muscles. 

The midwife saw us and guided us to our room. I laid down on the bed, had another INCREDIBLY powerful and strong contraction and vomited as well. She wanted to check how dilated I was but I knew this wasn’t necessary and needed to move off the bed onto the toilet. NOW.

The midwife underestimated how soon the baby was coming and left the room to get something for the shower. Just before the next contraction approached, I knew this was it. As a huge wave of a contraction came on, I told Dave that the babies head is coming out and he quickly rushed to get the midwife.

Then came moments of somehow peaceful transitions off of the toilet to taking off my clothes and suddenly on all fours naked in the shower. I was not feeling one bit of embarrassment or exposure like I thought I might in front of my partner, midwife and a random nurse all behind me in this moment. Instead I felt a good kind of vulnerability mixed with a whole lotta strength. Dave held the shower head on my back and the warm water soothed all of intensity and made it all the more beautiful.

My groans began to turn more into roars as I started to push my baby out rather than gently breathing her down. The midwife directed me to turn my sound more inward to pushing her out and once I did this, I felt her head and rest of her body emerge out of me.

Relief. It’s over.

As I heard my partner cry for the first time, I turned around and saw my beautiful (and rather big baby) who was surprisingly clean like she had been bathed. I managed to turn around in the shower. With both of us entangled in the cord which was still attaching her to me, I brought her into my arms.

Joy.

What a journey. What a creation. Dave and I had only been in a relationship for a couple of months before we conceived. What felt like a long 9 months of still getting to know each other and many huge changes, our baby had also been growing and here she was. A tiny little human with a huge future. Regardless of all the uncertainty Dave and I’s future held at this moment in all other aspects of life, one thing we knew for sure was this creation is certain to be loved and cherished forever, by both of us.

Thank you for reading one of my most treasured memories!

Love Jade xxx

The real all about me.

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First of all, for years the idea of starting a blog appealed to the creative side in me. Mainly because I like the idea of letting go all insecurity about who I am and doing this by sharing it and not knowing who will read it. A while back, the idea seemed liberating, but way too scary! What if someone judges what i write? Well, things have changed. I figure i’ve been through many scarier experiences than writing about my life and opinions. Plus, we are all surrounded by judgements all the time. So here’s to saying yes to life 👍✌

‘All about me’. ‘Tell me about yourself’. ‘How would you describe yourself in 3 words?’ I found myself with a blank stare at job interviews when this question came up, or ending up writing things like ‘bubbly, friendly, responsible’ on my resumes which is a bit of a fib considering it really depends on my mood and and a whole lot of other things as to if I’m going to be responsible or bubbly that day. I can’t describe myself in three words not because I’m not sure what my personality is or don’t know myself well but because I am human and not only a human but a WOMAN. Not only a woman but a woman who is constantly changing, growing and learning. I will no longer sit in a job interview and try to find the words that i think you want to hear or that you you should hire me because I’ll never let you down (because I probably will at some point, although I’ll do my best not to). But what I will say is that I have a kind heart, honest words, a curious mind and a whole lot of love. (Although I’m not so sure that will get me the job.) Some times I am consistent, show up on time, have awesome multi-tasking skills and good communication. Other times I am a complete whirlwind, forget my shoes, emotions all over the place, stumble on my sentences and am just trying to remember the next place im going.  I will have bad days where I may need a bit of support or encouragement, but so will you, and that’s when I’ll be there to help you right back.

I love real. I love to speak the truth and tell you exactly how it is, just as I love hearing what someone truly thinks. What about the whole ‘How are you?’ ‘Oh, i’m fine.’ I want to tell you how irritable ive been feeling and im not sure why, or that i find it so damn hard to be a housewife sometimes that i wonder if im cut out for this job, not just ‘yeah, I’m okay. ‘ I want you to tell me about how demanding your job is or your deepest desires. This may be a risky way to be as sometimes I can find myself caught up in situations where people may not like what I have to say or I may stick my nose in a public situation where I feel I have to speak my mind to try and help someone. But at the end of a day, REALNESS is amazing. I am not necessarily or claim to be an empowered woman with feminist values all the time and dont like to try and maintain any kind of identity like that anymore because thats just not realistic for me, i just want to keep it real.

I think there is a bit of a stigma around maintaining some kind of ‘mystery’ as a woman. Sure, there are times when it is socially inappropriate to say certain things or some things which should be kept to one selves but I think sometimes we need to aim to proudly be ouselves, allow people to be shocked at what we do or say, and be a shoulder to cry on because we all go through hard times in our different ways and how the heck are we supposed to be there for one another if we don’t be real about how we feel. 

I cannot believe i spent my teenage years thinking that i am working towards fitting into a certain genre or way. Even now i have days where i am focused on all that i find difficult or my weaknesses. I am on a journey to finding my authenticity and celebrating my strengths more often that not.

So, to get to the point, I am writing this blog with the intention to start writing real things without any fear of what people might think. I believe that speaking up about anything whether it be a personal experience or what you believe is right is a great liberty and good for society. It normalises people’s ‘problems’ when they think they may be alone, it makes people aware of things they might not have been aware of before, and you never know, it may just save someones life one day. So, realistically if someone was to ask me about myself, I guess I’d tell them something like this:

First and foremost, I am a mother. This role as a mother has taken up every nook and cranny of my identity and my life for the past four years and it is the best thing I have ever done/will do. I never think about what I am ‘missing out’ as some young adults may think about young parents, as I know from experience that I get more joy and happiness from my children than I could ever have got from any time travelling overseas or any experience that not being a mother could have given me. Being a mother has also created and shaped me as an adult. I have been truly tested to the core and been through many hard times, not because my children have put me through hard times, but because I’ve always had the responsibility of caring for them to my best ability while I have been having a hard time. (Ive also experienced the negative side of hormonal imbalances since having my babes.) But so much positivity has come from being a mother, my heart grew full of compassion and empathy for others which was not there before, I became much more interested in health and world issues due to wanting to protect my children, and I became aware of the true beauty, fragility and joy that the world has to offer just from creating my children. Each age and step along the way brings with it new challenges and puts you in new situations. What a complete gift a child is to everyone. I am so utterly blessed with these children. I am also from time to time ridden with fear of not being able to always protect them from the world. They are so unbelievably precious that each birthday I celebrate not just the day that they were born but the fact that ‘Thank goodness they are still here and healthy!’ The world seems like such a dangerous place and you are forced into having to just trust it because sometimes you just need to let them go to school! 😉 They are also a constant reminder every day of my own potential. I cannot actually believe I created these beautiful creatures!

I am and always have been a curious question asker. As a young child I would ask questions about everything and I still do question everything. I am a huge over-thinker and take on a lot more problems that might not be my own where I can end up deeply hurt and feel helplesss. One beautiful phrase I remind myself of often is ‘Smile, you don’t own all the problems in the world.’ And ‘Stop overthinking, it’s okay not to know all the answers.’ 🙂

Another pretty important thing you should know about me is that ever since I was a child I have struggled with anxiety which has come out in all different forms over the years. It is only of recent times that i have learnt to accept and embrace this part of myself which I had previously always viewed as such a dark aspect of the way i am. But the truth is, my anxiety has always led me to seeking out positive change and i would not have a lot have discovered a lot of the things that inspire me and which I adore today if it wasn’t for this so-called weakness. Because of it it also gives me the compassion  to understand people who are struggling and has given me the life experience to be able to truly care for and help others. Anxious people can often find life to be a lot more difficult than most but they are often also extremely creative and tend to be the ‘doers’ and positive changes makers of the world. So even though I have had many times in life which have been a struggle due to my anxiety and some days still can be, I choose to now trust in that this is not a negative thing and is actually a kind of gift.

I am a complete lover of life and want to explore, experience and learn everything, and I want to do it now!!! This can sometimes lead to me to be confused about what direction I am heading, what my goals are and how to get there because I can never make my mind up because I just want to do and be everything. So I am currently learning one of the most important things of all. Organisation! I am learning how to set my goals and how to get there, to slow down and enjoy all the beauty along the way. I am naturally extremely unorganised so being a housewife truly tests you, this is a priority of mine which I am working hard at.

I come from an amazing family who has had it’s ‘realness’ of up’s and down’s yet my siblings and I have supportive and close relationships with each other. I am the youngest child of four. I have two sisters and one brother. We all moved from the United Kingdom when I was 10 years old and my parents seperated when I was 14. I rely hugely on my sister’s and mum’s support and advice through all my life decisions.

I am a qualified yoga instructor but recently stopped teaching as I felt I couldn’t balance teaching, studying the practice and motherhood at the same time without becoming overwhelmed. Yoga is a very spiritual practice which I have a deep and passionate connection to but it needs to be maintained and is a disciplinary practice where you have to turn up at your mat consistently and right now I am not focused on that. So my current studies involve fully participating and finding time to balance my relationships, interests and this crazy and wonderful life that I have.

So there is a little bit about me. Stay tuned for more insight into myself, my life and the people in it as well as all over the place blogs about all kinds of things from a bit of an all over the place person.

Have a beautiful day wherever you are reading this right now 💖

Jade xx

Gratitude.

Gratitude. ‘the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.
One word that means a lot to me.

Most of us have heard something of the benefits of being grateful. Most health and wellness advocates talk about keeping a ‘gratitude journal’. Traditions from buddhism to yoga talk much about intentionally being grateful and it is important in many religions.

I’ve learnt that gratitude doesn’t have to be a complex practice. It is a very simple thing, a way that we can choose to be. The more you remember and choose to be grateful, the easier it becomes and your brain can rewire it’s thinking patterns from focusing on the negative to the positive. This can completely transform ones life, bringing joy and grace into ones life.

In every moment there is something to be grateful for. Once we start practicing gratitude for simple things, we can start to be creative in how grateful we feel towards things. We may start choosing to feel grateful for the bed that we get to sleep in, the morning coffee, a hot shower. We can then extend this gratitude to everything even in the more difficult times. For example I might choose to be grateful for having the choice to make healthier choices for myself. Or to be grateful for the support that I have from my family and even the society that I live in whenever I may need it.

Gratitude to me is an incredibly powerful transformative tool. It is well known and accepted by most now that our thoughts create our reality and I believe is there is one thing we can focus on to start creating positive changes it is gratitude. Because we are already blessed in this very moment with an abundance of life and love (especially in our western society where we are lucky enough to not have the fear of being blown up or killed each day). It just takes a bit of practice in changing our perspective to notice all our blessings. Then we can realise that we already have all that we seek. It is then that we give ourselves an opportunity to live a life full of love and appreciation.

I am still learning to extend my feelings of gratitude more and more as all my life my brain seems to have been on an automatic negative thinking style most of the time. Often seeing the negative side of most situations. But you know what I am so grateful for? Gratitude. The ability to feel gratitude. It feels so damn good to realise how wonderful your life is and I hope to feel it in my heart every day.

‘Enjoy the little things, for one day you might look back and realise that they were the big things.’ Robert Brault

‘Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.’ Charles Dickens

‘Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance’ Eckhart Tolle

‘Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity..it makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.’ Melody Beattie’

 

 

Fluoride-free toothpaste recipe

This is a guide to making your own toothpaste. There are some good fluoride-free toothpaste on the market but there are definite benefits to making your own toothpaste.

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Benefits include…

-Saving money in the long run.

 -You can vary the methods in how you make it to suit the tastes of children or individuals in your family.
-You know exactly what is in it.

Apart from not containing any fluoride, your homemade toothpaste won’t contain any…

-Artificial colours

-Sodium Lauryl Sulphate (SLS) (a chemical foaming agent which can cause skin irritation.)

-Glycerin – there have been studies that Glycerin leaves a coating on the teeth which leads to the teeth not being able to re-mineralise naturally, causing tooth decay.

-Sugar

-And above all else, it won’t contain any fluoride. There are plenty of sources and research explaining why fluoride is bad for you. Below are a couple links about the issue…

http://www.project.nsearch.com/profiles/blogs/sodium-fluoride-and-it-s-effects-on-the-pineal-gland-third-eye

http://www.naturalnews.com/029140_toothpaste_fluoride.html

However, this article isn’t about convincing anyone that fluoride is bad. That is for you to find out for yourself if you wish ☺ Continue reading for my preferred variation of your own all-natural toothpaste.

Ingredients…

– 4 tbs coconut oil (anti-microbial, among other boundless health benefits)
– 3 tbs Bentonite clay (extremely good for you, no need to worry about swallowing it. Helps re-mineralise the teeth and heal tooth decay)
– 3 tbs filtered water
– ½ tsp Himalayan sea salt (good for scrubbing off any plaque)
– 3 tbs pure baking soda
– 10 drops 100% pure peppermint essential oil (tastes beautiful)
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Method…
Simply mix all of the ingredients together in a bowl with a wooden spoon. Keep adding the water slowly until you get to the desired texture that you want in your toothpaste. Vary the amounts equally depending on how much toothpaste you want to make. Spoon the mixture into an airtight container. You can purchase all of these items at the health store ‘Mrs Flannery’s’ in Australia and most likely any other health store. Bentonite Clay is also known as ‘Green Clay’ and is a very affordable price. It is best if you can get these items certified organic.
If you live in Australia, you can buy a reverse osmosis filter that filters out all heavy metals and fluoride.

In regards to the essential oil, you can vary what oil you use such as citrus oils, cinnamon etc depending on the taste you are after.

If you’re unsure or concerned about the safety of ingesting essential oils, there are other alternatives you can use. Especially if you are worried about your children swallowing excessive amounts of the toothpaste when they brush.

Good alternatives are.

-Peppermint essential oil

-Xylitol (there have been studies that xylitol can help heal cavities)

-Ground cinnamon

If you prefer not to use baking soda in this recipe it will still work fine without it.

Tips…

 -Remember not to dip the toothbrush into the container when brushing. Use a clean finger or butter knife to put it onto your toothbrush each time, to avoid bacteria getting into the toothpaste.
-It is worth a mention that it is important to clean or change your toothbrush regularly. A toothbrush is a breeding ground for bacteria. A good way to clean it is to add some diluted tea tree oil to a glass and leave the toothbrush to soak in it overnight. This will get rid of a lot of the bacteria.
-It may be a good idea to prepare the toothpaste outside, as the clay can make the process quite messy.

This blog post is from a website I write articles forMy healthy hints profile